#41 - Naughty Ken Jennings

Jeopardy all star champion, Ken Jennings, has a bee in his bonnet.

Using his blog like a sledgehammer on Alex Trebek, Ken declares that Alex died in a firey crash and was replaced with a cyborg... opr something like that. Here is an excerpt from naughty Ken's Alex Trebek rant:


"Finally, Alex. I know, I know, the old folks love him.

Nobody knows he died in that fiery truck crash a few years back and was immediately replaced with the Trebektron 4000 (I see your engineers still can’t get the mustache right, by the way.)

But that’s beside the point:

“Alex” is the franchise. You can’t just bring in Ryan Seacrest without warning, more’s the pity. But I think a few little host tweaks would do a lot of good.

On Price Is Right, Bob Barker ends every show with a plug for his personal favorite cause. “Spay or neuter your pet!” or whatever. Something like this would humanize Trebek. I propose a new sign-off, along the lines of, “Can our returning champion do it again on tomorrow’s show? Tune in and find out, everybody. Legalize cannabis. Good night.”

You know how Trebek likes to read foreign words in these thick, strained accents, thinking he’s being muy auténtico? He should continue to do this, but instead of delivering them himself, he needs to have a little ventriloquist’s dummy with a sombrero to pipe in with those words. (The sombrero can be switched with a beret for French words.)

Whenever Alex says “Correct!” to a contestant, he should do the two-index-finger point, like Isaac in the Love Boat credits.

You and I have a lot of history, Jeopardy! You know I think the world of you…you’re putting my kids through college, for crying out loud! So I think I can be open with you in a way that others just can’t. I hope you take this advice in the spirit in which it was offered. Remember, I only criticize because I…

Love,

Ken

XOXOXO

Okay, I am reminding myself to never cross Ken Jennings.

I mean... what a stinker!

The automaton on that show had been Ken...

or was I the only one to notice that.

Okay, sometimes Ken could be snippy, but... hey didn't you start thinking after awhile that his performance on Jeopardy was a tad scary.

Guess it takes an automaton to know one.

AOL readers' polls show that folks response to Ken Jennings little Jeopardy "bash-a-thon" is overwhelmingly appalled.

Why?

Because after winning $2.5 million , Ken Jennings... your attitude seems just a bit... hmmm...

ungrateful?

So what is the final answer to Mr. Jennings little Trebektron 4000...

Here you go, Ken:

"What is humble pie?"



RESOURCES:

Ken Jennings - Blog